Let it Be

Here's one of the the most moving and eloquent pieces I've ever read about black women and hair (something I know far too much about!).

It's by Tami at Anti Racist Parent, and it's a reminder to me that even though I've worn my hair natural for many years, I'm not totally free from the insecurity that led to my spending too much money and too many hours in salons, enduring scalp burns from harsh relaxers, and developing an unhealthy dependence on my hairdresser. I was afraid of my hair, and so I let others tell me what to do with it. That phase of my life was a tangled mess!

 White adoptive moms of Ethiopian girls may have to learn how to care for their daughters' hair, but black mothers like me have a harder psychological task -- to let our daughter's hair just be.

Image courtesy of Pheno09on Flickr.com.

Comments

[Bridgett]

I can relate! I love when my son's hair grows out, but he too hates to have it picked or combed. So, off to the barber he goes with his dad. Funny, he doesn't really like that experience either....Strict rules apply in the black community about what should and should not be done with children's hair. A woman at the playground actually asked me if I had cut my daughter's hair, or was it "just like that?" It's endless, the ways in which we restrict our own freedom.

[kristine]

Wow your last line is especially wonderful. I had seen that post and really liked it also. My son has been growing his hair and my husband will sometimes say 'When are you going to cut your hair?' our son is 5 and I think that is old enough to decide if you want long or short hair (but now a mohawk like he wanted.) Anyway, I know for my husband it's two fold, one he's tired of hearing my sons whining about coming it and two he's thinking about what his mother in Detroit is going to say when she sees it.